Osaka

After the conference I headed to Osaka to see my friend Chihiro. He used to teach at my base school in Hagi and made me feel really welcome during the past year. I especially grateful to him for teaching me bad Japanese words!! However, I must admit that I was a bad friend turning up with one of the biggest hangovers of my life. I was not very talkative. gomen henna megane!! A very sad thing happened whilst in Osaka. My camera packed it in. We'd been through a lot: a cracked screen at camping, drunkenly dumped in a bowl of ramen and various other mishaps. This was the last ever photo that it took. SNIFF SNIFF.
That night we hit the beer once more and met up with Hannah, Mark and Tammy, who for some crazy reason made it out to a club that night despite being just as hungover as me. Good work!!

Kobe Recontracting Conference (and a little drinking)

So those of us who have decided to stay another year (plus Perez the jammy bugger) got an all expenses paid trip to Kobe for 3 days. The conference is intended to refresh our jaded teaching enthusiasm and to encourage us to make the most of our second year. If drinking and partying for three days solid doesn't make you love Japan and your job again, what the hell will?

It was Steph's birthday so we managed to find her some cock



So........... Steph's birthday. Curry, Karaoke then......... I'm sure you'll all see the photos at some point. Let's just say there was underwear, a piano, a fountain, cleavage and a crotch. You do the
math.

MUD, MUD, MUD and er MUD

Too tired to make sense.

Left club, found wheelchair, 2 hour snooze in car, volleyball, mud, rice field, mud, sunshine, mud, sunburn, mud, beer, mud, hot dogs, mud, river, mud, muddy hot tub, mud, El Diablo, mud, onsen, no more mud.

Hiroshimashup!!

I have now been to the US Air base in Iwakuni twice. The first time I had to be smuggled in stealth stylee under a blanket in the boot of a van as I didn't have the appropriate ID. Not wanting to repeat this, this time I came fully prepared only to be waved straight through the gates - no questions asked. After realising their error they eventually came to find us but I must say that they really should step up on the security front. Perez didn't need to swim in after all.

We spent the afternoon with the marines eating, drinking and playing rugby and football. The marines were great hosts so thanks to them and Crystal for organising it. Sorry, didn't take any photos.

Then on to Hiroshima for the lash! The last time I was in Hiroshima it was pissing down with rain, we were lost, I was projectile vomiting, I was extremely drunk and don't remember much. I then woke up in a love hotel (with mirrors on the ceiling) with Pete in a pink yukata and Kat (mordor's friend for all you warwick veterans) lying next to me. Nothing dodge honest!

This time I was determined to still be as drunk but not as ill. I succeeded and made it through to 6 in the morning.

Tanuki's Tokyo Tales

WARNING! SOME READERS MAY FIND SOME PARTS OF THE FOLLOWING STORY DEEPLY UPSETTING.

Once upon a time in Abu-cho there was an evil old man named David Nathan Swope Weinstein. His only friend was his Keitai (mobile phone) accessory, Tanuki S Weinstein. Despite being treated awfully and being fed only cheap packet curry, Tanuki stood my his owner no matter what. Then Tanuki's world was shattered. David returned from trip to Nagasaki with a new Keitai accessory and Tanuki was tossed into the bin with only empty packets of curry to keep him company. Not quite accustomed to the Japanese rubbish system, David didn't empty the waste bin for weeks and Tanuki was forced to lay there watching David having fun with his new accessory. These weeks of torment put Tanuki in a dark evil place. Pauline and myself took it upon ourselves, as co founders of the NSPKA (National Society for the Protection of Keitai Accessories), to take Tanuki on a Tokyo holiday to show him that there is more than Dave to life. (The NSPKA is also in cooperation with the NSPHBD - National Society for the Protection of Heart Breaker Dave - there are millions of women everywhere suffering from their hearts broken when they relise the "nice guy"thing is all an act.)
Chorong showing Tanuki the love and respect he deserves.Tanuki mingling with the Harajuku girls.Tanuki joining in with the Elvis impersonators at HarajukuNews of Tanuki's story soon spread across the Land and protests against the mis treatment of keitai accessories were held. Pauline and I decided to expose Tanuki to some history and culture so we took him to the World Heritage Site at Nikko.
The saying "Hear no evil, speak no evil, see no evil" originates from a carving on one of the buildings at Nikko. Tanuki found some friends to do their own version.
Some of the sites at Nikko reminded poor Tanuki of his time with Dave. At the NSPKA, we encourage our accessories to face their demons.At Nikko there was a statue of the NSPKA's patron : Prince Yamane Sensei. Tanuki had a whale of a time snogging and flirting with this Christine Perez lookalike. (no tanukis were injured during the taking of this photo)
The next step in Tanuki's rehabiltation was to expose him to the rich variety of food in this world. A far cry from his packet curry days.

Tanuki doing a spot of hanami.We treated Tanuki to a trip to the Asahi Brewery Headquarters. We let him try all kinds of new beers. Unfortunately they were out of the beer named 'ALT'. Why is everyone staring at me? Have I got a giant golden poo on my head or something? eh?




Whilst Pauline and I headed to the Ghibli animation museum, Tanuki decided to go on his own little adventure and managed to find the oldest hydroelectric power plant in Japan. Thrilling stuff.
Here's the cheeky little scamp trying to break in for a closer look. Abunai - yo!