Halloween in Yanai

The costumes were just amazing! What did I go as? Jackie Baggins, of course. I spent the whole night having Japanese folk touching my 100yen self inflating boobs, asking if I was really a man and pulling my wig (aka known as my real hair!! get off!) The 7-11 workers had me giggling for days after. Suzy Wong, Max Value and Joy Full. Wsh I had been there to see them hijack the 7-11 store round the corner.
Is Dave not the hottest witch that you have ever feasted your eyes upon?
Dansama did an impressive samba.
Stephen Hawkins showed his face.
Queen and Queen of the fancy dress competition - Jackie and Anpanman. Us Hagites are just unbeatable.
Genius! Matt and Crystal as sushi.

Dave's shindig

Well I certainly made up for my sober birthday at Dave's house party. There was plenty of beer and plenty of tequila. Dave's co workers were crazy!

My birthday - and I didn't have a single drink!!

22! I'm getting old but at least I'm still the youngest in the ken. The students at school made me birthday cards and sang to me in class. The English department gave me some Hagi yaki beer cups. They obviously know what I'm like! This evening I went to Dan and Rosie's Halloween party for their English conversation class. Rosie made me a cake!! Thank you!!! It was good shit. I had a really nice sober day.

Apologies

I would just like to apologise for the lack of bloggage over the past few weeks. Whilst camping in Ato I broke my camera, being the drunken mess that I am. As a result, I've not had any photos of the mash that has taken place. I have therefore stolen all the photos from other blogs. Sorry!

Good news though! When I purchased my camera within the first few weeks of arriving I could speak no Japanese except for 'hai'. Luckily this lack of language caused me to sign up for insurance and guarantee. Camera is fixed!

Coca Cola

Anyone at home would know that I am addicted to Coke (the drink not the drug, although the zen zen humiliation has driven me to alcohol, boobs and violence with plastic automatic weapons - drugs are the final piece in the jigsaw). Anyone at home would also know that I view Diet Coke as the lovechild of George Bush and the Devil. It disgusts me. It's wrong. It makes my skin crawl.

I hope Pete realises the pain I went through whilst purchasing a bottle for him today. I feel dirty.

Help!

Does anyone know why my blog is so mash up and half way down the page?

Camping in Ato

I don't think too much needs to be said about this night. It was great fun; yaki niku (barbecue), campfire, wine, whiskey, round mongolian tents and great company. It was good to get to know people from Shimane Ken and also people from the other side of our own Ken.

At a very early stage in the night we all decided that we had drunk enough and that we were tired so we all shook hands, said goodnight and that was that. cough cough.

Thanks again to Victoria and James for organising it. Would love to do it again sometime (maybe we could stay up later and drink a bit more?)

koncho'd at kencho

Now I have only been in Japan for 76 days and I have already been targeted and publicly humiliated by the other JETs. Whilst at Kencho (our prefectural government office in Yamaguchi City) a certain publication known as 'Zen Zen' was distributed to everyone and then some. What I discovered on the back page, if I may be so frank, was truly shocking. I'm feeling emotional even just writing about it. I feel as though the editors have clapped their hands together and thrust their jouvenile, immature, grubby little fingers right up my arse!! (metaphorically speaking of course).It featured pictures of myself looking terribly hungover (which, although a rare sight, has lead the readers to believe otherwise), pictures of Jackie Kennedy and Frodo Baggins (I have no idea why) and this headline and blurb:

" LORD of the GUCH- The Fellowship of the Butchers"

"One man's quest to find the love of his life. The journey, finding his long lost mother, Jackie Kennedy. An epic that proves big things come in small packages. Join Matt and his other drinking buddies, in the Fellowship of the Butchers."

Where did all of this come from? I feel that I have been victimised and, as a result, my poor demure, non drinking self has been compromised. This, of course, had disasterous effects and I hope that you are all prepared to share the blame for the person that I have become.

The first stage of my breakdown was being driven to alcohol (something that we all know I deeply oppose). Luckily some JETs realised the error of their mocking ways and gave me moral support (and no we are not drinking from cans, on a bench, in the most central part of the city during the afternoon). I was then driven to seek out boobs. From a completely innocent young man, I was propelled into the seedy world that all you other JETs seem to rot in.
To pop the cherry on top of it all, I turned to using automatic weapons against poor, defenseless, karaoke singing plastic men.

All I have to say is that I hope you feel proud of yourselves.

Taiko Drumming

Pauline managed to organise for a group of us to try our hand at taiko drumming tonight. It was really good fun and I would love to kepp doing it except that they practice on saturdays.
Chorong, Pauline and Rosie showing us how good they are at banging (the drum of course. Some of you are just pure filth!)
Pete playing with his big one.

Mos Burger

May I please take a moment.... for Mos Burger. The best invention since the burger! I bloody love that place! Although, I have frequented this particular establishment far too often as the guy who works there now knows my order and and supplies me with extra mayonaise without even asking. mmm!

Hofu Festival

After the English camp, one of the women offered to take Jen and I around Hofu and luckily there was a festival taking place.
This is Hiroko. She claimed that she came to English camp to find young men! She then chose me to be her Prince Charming in Cinderella and then tried to hold my hand in this picture! Oh I've get the hotties alright!


This poor girl was the equivalent to 'carnival queen' and had to wear 12 kimonos. Too bloody hot for that shinanigans.

Hofu English Camp

This weekend I volunteered to work at an English camp in Hofu whilst many other JETs were off at drinking festivals and partying on Oshima Island (if I had known I wouldn't have volunteered), however, I ended up having a really good time.

High point: winning the best actor award for my portrayal of Prince Charming in 'Cinderella: The Later Years'. Managed to get a bottle of whiskey out of it!!!!!!!

Low point: Teaching the 'Hokey Kokey'. I really got into the "woooooooooooo's" (can't believe the American version doesn't have that - it's the best bit!!!)

This bloke taught us folk dancing but he kept forgeting the steps so it would change half way through each song. He set up his own sound system and had his own microphone attached to his shirt. He was a leg end!
Matt and Crystal at the tea ceremony. It was luminous green! It was foul!
We got the chance to listen to these women playing the shimansen and then tried it ourselves afterwards.

Chomonkyo River Gorge

With only two hours sleep and completely under the influence, I still thought it was a good idea to go hiking in Chomonkyo River Gorge. Mistake! The hangover kicked in on the way there. Luckily it was more of a stroll than a hike. The views were pretty imressive but I was concentrating more on standing up. However, a quick dip in the river soon sorted me out.

Afterwards I had my first onsen (hot spring) experience. Couldn't think of anything better than getting bollock naked with loads of Japanese men on a Sunday afternoon. Actually, it wasn't as bad as I was expecting it to be, though I haven't quite grasped the whole onsen etiquette yet.

Drunk, again!

OK, so what do you do when you're really hungover? Go to another party of course! We experienced the culinary delights of Miss Alex Potter. Remember the name! She's gonna be the next Delia (but better looking). The menu was Mexican and it was so good to eat something that wasn't Japanese. Can I request a roast for next time? Anyway, was finding it really hard to get back on it in my hungover state (but was still encouraging everyone else!) The time came to leave with Dan and Rosie (sorry guys, feel as though I'm treating you as a taxi service) but my arm was twisted to stay for some more drinking and poker. The night could have gone two possible ways:

1- struggling to keep on it and falling asleep really early
2- Finding inner strength and getting absolutely munted

It ended up as it usually does. (number 2 if you don't know me). Ended up going to bed at six in the morning, despite having to go hiking the next day.

Had a really good night getting to know everyone a little better ( I know that sounds a bit cheesy, but ut's true) It was good to be around fellow brits and stupid sayings from home. If only I had known Kat when we were at Warwick. I'm sure we could have had a few carnage nights. It's weird to think that we had probably rubbed asses in the market place at Top B and not even realised it! The party animals left standing (well more of a sprawl on the floor than standing) : Me, Alex, Louise and Pete.

Paaaaartaaaaaaaaaaay!

Tonight Dan and Rosie had yet another partay! Choron, their Korean friend, cooked lots of good food and, yes you've guessed it, a lot of alcohol was consumed. The night ended disgracefully with Pete and I having to be put to bed by Choron because we were that wasted. A good night!

Top: the aftermath.

Bottom: Me, Dan, Dave, Pete and random Japanese teacher (too drunk to remenber his name)